I used to do a lot of rock climbing when I was younger, but I was much boulder back then.

Morning all. Hope you are all well.


I am in bed with the kids. My new job while much closer to home involves me working harder. Much harder than I thought. I felt that I did more than my fair share at my old place, examples being prescriptions and covering sickness. But this place is different. The work is divided in an equal manner, but there is more of it. So today, before I moonlight this afternoon, I am going into work to do some of the backlog of work that has built up.


Which means that I will not get to spend as much time with the kids. And they only stay small for so long.


My son has learned how to get women to do his bidding. When my wife has some kids and parents over, he would tell one mother that he needed to do a poo. The thing is that he has yet to be toilet/potty trained. We try and fail. But he loved getting grown women to strip him and wait on him!


My daughter in the meantime came back from school yesterday with a plaster on her knee. She fell down in the playground. Yes she did cry (a tiny bit she now says) and got both a plaster and a bravery sticker. Next week she starts full days! My daughter has moved on to that next stage. At the moment when she talks about what happened at school she seems to forget that she is being taught things. But I am hoping it is going in.


Anyway, take care all and I hope you like this joke...


Woman - A Chemical Analysis


Element : Woman
Symbol : Wo
Atomic Weight : Accepted as 118, but known to vary 105-175.
Discoverer : Adam
Occurrence : Copious quantities in all Urban areas, with slightly lower
concentrations in Suburban and Rural areas. Subject to seasonal
fluctuations.


Physical Properties :
a) Surface usually covered with painted film.
b) Boils at nothing, freezes without reason.
c) Melts if given special treatment.
d) Bitter if used incorrectly. Can cause headaches. Handle with care!
e) Found in various states; ranging from virgin metal to common ore.
f) Yields to pressure applied to correct points.


Chemical Properties :
a) Has great affinity for Gold, Silver, Platinum and many precious stones.
b) Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
c) May explode spontaneously if left alone on dates.
d) Insoluble in liquids, but there is increased activity when saturated in
alcohol to a certain point.
e) Repels cheap material. Neutral to common sense.
f) Most powerful money reducing agent known to Man.


Uses :
a) Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars.
b) Can greatly improve relaxation levels.
c) Can warm and comfort under some circumstances.
d) Can cool things down when it's too hot.


Tests :
a) Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in natural state.
b) Turns green when placed beside a better specimen.


Caution :
a) Highly dangerous except in experienced hands. Use extreme care when handling.
b) Illegal to possess more than one.