My wife said, "Can we put the Christmas tree up tonight?" I said, "Why, has it got nowhere else to stay?"

Evening all.  Sorry about the delay since my last post.  Just a quick one.  Well, loads have happened since my last post, but I can not remember everything.  So I will just stick to the last few days.  My daughter has loved the last few days, as she has been to three birthday parties in the last four days.  My son is a bit peeved as he only went to one of them.  So, today, when my daughter was dropped off at one, we went home and put the Christmas tree up.  Poor kid, he keeps thinking that it is Christmas as the tree is up.  We keep telling him it is in a few weeks time, but he is only three.  That and time goes much slower for kids than it does for adults.  Anyway, good night all.


We all get asked, what do you want for christmas?
So one day I visited santa and asked him.
"What would you like for Christmas?".
He turned to look me in the eye and said, "To have Christmas off."

I saw this on the internet today

Teaching preschoolers the ways of the world...

I was downstairs doing some suitably stereotypical female domestic task with my 18 month old daughter in tow. Son (3 years) and husband upstairs playing with something altogether more masculine (fixing the computer). 3 year old son calls down to me 'mum, where's my camera', the reply went something like, 'in your toy box I think'. A few minutes later, 'mum, I can't find it'. I reply, 'have you looked?'. Son replies, 'We've done a man's look'. Husband asks, 'What's a man's look', son replies, 'it's where you don't look properly'

Needless to say, it was posted by a woman.  And to be fair, it is true.  Most of the time.  My daughter, like most girls her age, can be just as good as I am at finding things.  My son normally is worse.  My daughter has not been well, and therefore was not able to go to school.  We were tempted to send her anyway, but she had a rash and it was PE which would have meant that everyone would have seen the rash...  Did get to see both kids, as they came round to my work for lunch today.  And of course, I got to see my lovely wife.  All in all, today, seeing the family for lunch, was a great day.

You have never played "I spy with my little eye" until you have been to Chernobyl

Evening all.  I have realised that I forgot to mention that we watched a film yesterday.  Spy Kids.  The kids loved it.  They have watched the trailers for it before and both wanted to watch it.  I have to say, as a film for kids it was great.  As a film for adults, no, it was not good.  It was not terrible, well, it was bordering on it at times.  But while I would never watch it for my own entertainment, I did see why the kids loved it, and from a parents perspective it was a good film.  If you are not a parent, do not bother watching it.  Seriously, do not.  Mind you, being parents, my wife and I are doing our best to avoid having to watch Chipwrecked which both kids want to watch (sob).

Of course, one of the things they love about going to the cinema is the experience.  My daughter got to ask for the tickets and both kids loved getting the popcorn with my wife.  My son is getting used to watching films in the cinema.  Normally at home, he will play with toys rather than watch an entire film.  In past films, he has, when sat next to his mother, been prone to climbing on her.  Yesterday we was great.  It may have helped that I held the popcorn in front of him though!

Anyway, today they went to a fireworks party.  A spectacular one and one tailored to kids of that age as well as many watching fathers.  And the people involved in setting it up had done a spectacular job considering that they were volunteers and had to do this in addition to what they normally did (and for the record, I was not one of them).  Special thanks on that have to go to Neil who set up the spectacular display.  Anyway, I hope the video's below make you laugh as I have to go now.

Our cat really hates fireworks ...

Especially when we tie a rocket to its legs.

Fireworks are like Jedward; loud and pointless. The difference is, I know which I'd rather see explode.

"Dad, can we go out in the garden for fireworks?"

"No son, I've got a bad back and I can't move from this sofa."

"Please dad, next door are letting off loads."

"Next door? Okay son, grab me a beer and my coat."

What does Frankie Cocozza have that the other X-Factor contestants don't? STDs

Evening all.
Well first of all, the X factor.  Being at work yesterday, I did not get to watch it so taped it and just listened to the songs which in my view is the best way to watch it.  I also taped Strictly Come Dancing which I liked, though which the kids got to watch last night.  The two kids have different favourites and both have taken to dancing.  It helps that my daughter is at an after school club where she dances.  Still has no rhythm though!  Mind you, when it comes to clapping, my son, who appears to have natural rhythm has one then either.  Fankie Cocozza still gets my wife annoyed, but that seems to be the case with other people as well. She has been dancing to Olly Murs last term, I am not sure what she is dancing to this term. Maybe she will let us know this week!

Hopefully, I have recovered from Man-flu, which I had bad on the weekend. I got better for the week, but then got something else. Did not stop me going to work, but I was not up to my ususal standard when it came to getting through the amount of work I faced. Fortunately, it was not too hard when it came to the amount of work that I had to deal with, and most importantly, I have a great wife who takes care of me. The kids would be a bit under the weather for a day, and then get better, and then run rings round my wife and I. For while I have moaned about myself being not too well, I have forgotten that my wife has not been well either.

Anyway,it was nice that Arsenal kept two clean sheets on the trot.  I hope that will continue, but I doubt it.  While West Brom were not much of a threat, Marseille was.

Halloween - the only time ugly people feel normal

I've gone as David Cameron this Halloween and I'm really getting into the spirit of it.

Sitting on my arse, doing bugger all, and explaining to the kids at the door that due to the shortage of sweets at the moment I'll have to take some of theirs..

Anyway, the kids and Halloween.   Negotiation was needed to encourage the kids to eat, i.e. eat or you do not go out.  Both kids, ate, finally.  And then they went out, my daughter dressed as Spiderella and my son as a Wizard (though he was king of the vampires at Nursery earlier in the day).  They loved it.  Sweets, dressing up, more sweets, glow sticks, more sweets, glow sticks, more sweets, E numbers, more sweets, and did I mention, more sweets?

Me, I did not get to share this.  I came back to put them to bed.  Tired, they were crying more than usual.

Hopefully they will not wake us up tonight!

My daughters book review

Afternoon all. Am still ill. I think that I am a bit better than before, but then I have just been sitting down for the last hour or so.

My daughter has just finished her book review. She got a book for half term and loved reading it. I did read it to her (and her brother) first, and I have to say, I was shocked at the ending!  They liked it as well, and the best bit was that there were no nightmares.  Unlike last night, but then that was my fault as the kids had watched Willow before hand and my daughter had tried to watch Sarah Jane, but had to stop on the episode she was watching as it was too distressing.  I do forget that she is only six at times.

She did have to write about it though, this being the book, not what she was watching.  The sheet of paper she wrote on was far shorter than the video's above.

My wife has been greating looking after me today, mind you, she is always great at looking after me, but she has been patient and understanding at just how pathetic I have been.  My son is a bit stir crazy as normally on a Sunday, they are taken out, which I have not been able to do today.

What I did manage to do though was watch the Arsenal highlights on Match of the Day.  It was great to beat Chelski, but out defensive performance was terrible.  If we play against a team that pays more attention to defending, we are screwed as we were opened up at times with ease and were lucky not to have let in more goals before half time.  And we were lucky not to have our goal keeper sent off in the second half.  Saying that, I am sure that the second Chelski goal involved a foul on Mertesacker.  Anyway, it is great to get a result against Chelski and get over the run of bad results that we have had against them, but we need to pay more attention to our back four.

Anyway, take care all.

At half time, the Chelsea team clearly got the wrong end of the stick when the manager said to go out in the second half and give it to Arsenal

Life is as simple as ABC - Arsenal Beat Chelsea .  Today is one of the few times I had a look at the score before Match of the Day.  I was very glad that I did so.  And now I have a big smile on my face.  I have to say, I did not expect to win against Chelski, especially playing away.  And that smile is needed as I am not feeling too well today.  I have been stuck with man flu.  Anyway, this week, since my last post, I got to watch the Arsenal-Bolton game in the League Cup, at the Grove, thanks to a patient I treated.  Just to note, it was not a gift, I still had to buy the ticket, but I doubt I would have got such a good seat if I had arranged it myself.  I was right by the pitch (and watching the highlights, I could see myself) which was great!  While we have had a terrible start to the season, and I did start to lose the faith, Wenger was right, things would get better.  Of course, we have to keep winning games.  While the win was great, at the end of the day, it was three points, and it is the same three points that we get for beating Stoke.  We have to retain focus, especially if we are to continue our League cup run.

Anyway, since my last post my Mother has been up to baby sit.  We picked her up and drove her into London so that she could pick a present, which ended up being Hello Kitty related.  While I have to say, I hate Hello Kitty, she loves it, and that is what matters.  Both of them loved having my mother up and it is always nice to see her spend time with the two kids.  Anyway, the two of them are now dressed up for Halloween.  We have stuff in the attic which I have brought down today and they are dressed up as Spiderilla and a wizard.  Last year when they did this, they chased me about to turn me into a frog!

The video above is of a Halloween Mummy that they got last year.  They love it.  I hate it.  They play it over and over and over.  It mysteriously was left upstairs when I took the Halloween box out of the loft, but this must have been subconcious as I do not remember taking it out.  I wish I had left it in the loft!

Man flu....women just don't get it.

What's the difference between Man Flu and Bieber Fever?
One of them is a terrible affliction that can make you wish you were dead.
The other is Man Flu.