I told my kid that his pet rabbit was the easter bunny and was rewarded with a big smile and look of awe. which was nice compared to my wifes face when she told me he'd woken up on easter morning and eaten all the Maltesers that Fluffy had made him.

Morning all.  I hope you are well.  Me, I am ready to go back to work.  My wife took me to Legoland last week.  Well the kids came as well and they loved it.  I have had two weeks away from work, of which one week was spent doing agency work, and the last week was spent relaxing.

I did not get to spend as much time with the children as I would have liked, but for this year at least, it is going to have to be like that.  On the bright side I have had a great time with them, and have treasured the time that I have managed to have with my wife.

I hated my first experience of skydiving.

I jumped out of the plane with the other person next to me. Anyway about halfway down he said "So how long have you been an instructor?"  

And of course, how can I not mention the Arsenal?  Yes, it looks like we have thrown away the title.  But, this season, as in others, I continue to say "In Arsène we trust."  A look at how much money teams have spent on players shows that Arsenal are one of the low spenders in the league, and despite that, we sit third in the table (so far).  Yes, I would love it if we could win a few things, but to those who say we need to get rid of Arsène Wenger, other teams spend more than us, and win nothing.  Of course, I still think that we can win the title.  I just am aware that it the chances of doing so are very low.

What do Spurs and Heather Mills have in common? The second leg is just for show....

Snow White lived alone with seven men. Jasmine was in a forbidden relationship with Aladdin. Little Red Riding Hood didn't listen to her mother and went out. Pinocchio was a liar. Robin Hood was a thief. Tarzan walked without clothes on. Sleeping Beauty was kissed by a stranger and married him. Cinderella lied and sneaked out at night to attend a party.
These are the stories our parents raised us with & then they complain teenagers today are messed up?

Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected become the expected?

First of all, let me moan about the football.  Not only was it annoying that Arsenal drew, but what makes it worse is that ManUre came down from 2-0 down to win 2-4 away to West Ham.  The thing was, at 2-0 ahead, there were several incidents when ManUre should have had a man sent off and been reduced to ten men.  There are allegations that referees are biased towards ManUre, and while I do not think that is the case, Sir Alex Ferguson certainly knows how to play mind games.  


Yes, Arsenal should have managed to win against Blackburn, but results like that happen.  And yes, Rooney played really well.  Even though we went a bit ape.  But the injustice when ManUre should have been down to ten men...

Anyway, it has been a while since I made my last post.  And to be fair, I can not really go through all the things that have happened since my last post.  So I will stick to today.  It being a Wednesday, I was doing paperwork.  Got woken up early in the morning as my daughter had a nightmare.  Which meant that I got to work nice and early.  Did work, got home, took the kids to school and preschool and then back to work.  Then came home to pick up my son from pre-school.  Now one of the things that my daughter get to do is come home on her scooter.  Because my son heard this, he decided that he wanted to come home on his tricycle.  And to be fair to him, he is getting very good at it.  He is able to pedal, which is more than his older sister can do.  Though I have to admit, I feel a bit guilty that I have not taught her how to cycle properly.  Anyway, had a great fish pie that my wife had made, went back to work, got more work done (though as I arrived late, I did not get to go to a meeting I wanted to go to), then came home to pick up my daughter.  It was great, she had drawn a picture for me (I have to remember to put it up at work) and loved using her scooter to get home.  And because it was a lovely day, I managed to actually get to mow the lawn.  The kids loved the weather, having a pretend tea party, and then later, actually eating dinner in the garden.  Anyway, I am now at home.  The kids are in bed, and my wife has gone out for a well deserved night out at Jardine in Wivenhoe.

Anyway, time for me to sign off for now and if you are interested in something that I hope brings a smile to your face...

A bloke walks into a bar and asks the barman for "12 strong drinks of whatever you want". 

The barman pours 12 shots of vodka.

Almost immediately the man starts drinking drink after drink.

The barman wonders why this bloke is drinking so fast (by this time he is on his sixth shot) and asks.

The bloke replies "you would if you have what I have got" and keeps drinking.

The barman says " do you mind if I ask you what you have got?"

The bloke replies "50p!"

Did you hear about the lion who ate his whole family? He swallowed his pride!

Evening all again.  It has been a nice day today.  As usual, I worked yesterday.  Today, my wife arranged for us to go out.  

So, after feeding the kids (I burnt the bacon) we went out for a drive to Southwold.  My wife loves one of the bookshops there.  Anyway, it was an interesting drive there, as I had to take the same route to my old work.  Despite leaving seven months ago, I have not been back there.  Well, as I passed the road to my old work, I did have a sense of freedom.  I am not sure if this was because I was going up the coast, a trip I loved, or because I feel a lot better since I have left my work.

Do not get me wrong, I enjoyed working there, I was there for eight years after all, but the job, and to be fair, I, changed.  I do feel sorry that I have not been there since leaving.  But to be fair, I just have not had the time!  Although I am working closer to home, and feel that I am in a better place, I am working much harder than I did before.  Which has meant that I literally have not had the time to pop into my old place.

Anyway, it was great going to Southwold.  We used to live closer to it, and the last time we were there, it was when it was just three of us, i.e. before my son was born.  While my wife was in the shop, I took the kids to the beach.  Of course, we went to the bookshop first.  Obviously it has changed since we were there last.  But the beach is the same as it was, that does not get to change!  Well, they loved the beach, not that we got to spend that much time there, nor did we go to the pier.  And then once we had finished we drove of to Aldeburgh.  It did bring back memories of taking my youngest brother to see the nuclear power stations at Sizewell, back in the days when you could visit a nuclear power station.  (So far, we are not glowing green.)  Anyway, when in the town, we ended up eating at the Lighthouse.  A restaurant that my wife had tried to book a table at back when we lived closer to it.  Well, afterwards, it was a trip to the seaside.  We had promised the kids ice cream you see.  Well, while we were having ice cream, by the sea, well near it, we had a surprise.  At the shop we went to (or rather the stall) was near a artificial boating pond which was also very near the house where Grandpa in my Pocket is filmed.  My daughter wanted to go in it, but that is not an option for now.  She does love watching it.  After spending time at the sea, we came back home.  Not enough time for me, I do find it very relaxing being there, but it was very very cold.  It was warmer in Southwold, but parking is a bit harder there.  Anyway, I guess we might be going back to the sea more often as it gets warmer.       

 

If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of mortgage payments.

Good day to you all.
Life is interesting.  I am knackered, though I have to admit, I have been worse in the last few weeks.  But I have only another five months.  I am enjoying my job.  But, I am on trial for a year.  If they like me, I get a proper job here.  If not, well, then I have to look for another.  But in a few months time, I know either way.
Do not get me wrong, my last job, eight years of it was good much of the time.  And it was a lot easier, where I work now, I am having to work a lot harder.  But here, I get the impression that people work more as a team.  And when things need to be done, they get done.  The sad thing is that since I have left my old place, because of the amount of work I am having to do, I have not had a chance to get back in touch with my old work.  Which is a shame.  I do miss them, well most of them.  Almost all of them to be fair.


Anyway, it was my daughters learning conference today.  She is doing well at school.  It would be nice if her teacher, nice though she is, was able to remember to do certain things.  Like give us the list of tricky words that my daughter is meant to learn.  Also making sure that the books in her book bag (a bag of books from school that she learns to read) are up to date.  I was tempted to ask if other kids missed out on things as well.  It was strange to see my daughter simper in front of her teacher.  Mind you, her teacher kept doing that.  It is something that irritates me, and something that my daughter does not do at home.  It is really annoying that she has learned how to do it.


My son on the other hand has moved up a 'class' at his nursery.  And today, they sent him out to play, in a coat and vest.  To describe my wife and I as angry is a slight understatement.  Anyway, the nursery are going to get back to us as to why and how this happened.  It will be interesting to see what the excuse they have is for sending a three year old kid out to play in a coat and vest.  If this stops there, well that is one thing that is dependent on how they do things...


But I moan about me and my family.  Things are terrible for so many others in the world, at this time, Libya and Japan being two places.  In Libya there are many who are going to fight and die for freedom, hoping and praying that the west will impose a no-fly-zone, and instead, the west will take no action and let them die.  I know this as we in the west did this after the first Gulf War when those in the south rose up and stood up to Saddam Hussein.  We watched.  They died.  Let alone Japan.  So many died in the Tsunami, just like it happened before in Sri Lanka, Indonesia and other places.  And on top of that, those in Japan are trying to avoid nuclear disaster.  Well, my prayers go out to them, as well as those demonstrating for democracy elsewhere in the Middle East.


And while I moan about Arsenal, again, this puts things into perspective.  I want Arsenal to win.  But I would like just democracy in the Middle East more.  Which is just as well as I do not see Arsenal winning the title now.  Though I would love to be proved wrong!  Anyway, goodnight all.

A Catholic Priest, an Indian Doctor, a rich Chinese Businessman and an Aussie were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers in front of them.

The Aussie fumed, "What's with those blokes? We must have been waiting for fifteen minutes!"

The Indian Doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such poor golf!"

The Chinese Businessman called out "Move it, time is money"

The Catholic Priest said, "Here comes George the green-keeper. Let's have a word with him."

"Hello, George!" said the Catholic Priest, "What's wrong with that group

ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?"

George the green-keeper replied, "Oh, yes. That's a group of blind fire fighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime."

The group fell silent for a moment.

The Catholic Priest said, "That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight."

The Indian Doctor said, "Good idea. I'm going to contact my Ophthalmologist colleague and see if there's anything he can do for them."

The Chinese Businessman replied, "I think I'll donate £50,000 to the fire-fighters in honour of these brave souls"

The Aussie said, "Why can't they f*cking play at night?"

I'm not sure that 3 cup competitions are enough. Arsenal could easily get knocked out of many more if they had the chance!

Oh well. At least we have a chance of finishing second this season. One of our centre backs are out, our best winger out, our midfield talisman is out and we are down to one goalie.

But worse things happen at sea.

I just bought an audio book on how to do sign language

BREAKING NEWS: Manchester United have made a 20million pound bid for Swiss Superstar Barcelona say their ref is not for sale at any price!