An Iphone 5 user walks into a bar... or was it a bank... or was it a hotel. They're not sure really.

Right, since the last post on the kids, they have played another game of football.  They both liked it this time, though my son has this urge to pick up the ball and run with it...

On the weekend, took them to see my mother and my wife's parents.  While at my Mum's they have a great time with her, and also with Dougal, the dog.  When I say dog, I mean horse.  He is huge.  You could put a saddle on him and get the kids to ride him.  My daughter has always been nervous of him.  When she was a baby and we brought her round to the house, he had to be shut in the kitchen as otherwise he would have licked her to death.   He barked, after all, he wanted to see everyone and did not want to be in the kitchen away from everyone else.  She cried.  He barked to let her know he was there to protect her.  She cried more.  He barked louder...  You can see where I am going.  Anyway, the relationship between the two has stayed the same.  He loves her and wants to lick her, she screams...  My son sat on my brother when there and played with Dougal.  She wanted to, and we did try to kick the ball.  My son did it, but my daughter kept hesitating, which meant that Dougal would pick it up, which made her nervous as she did not want him to bite her leg by accident (which he would never do).  But, she did get to play with my mothers cat. She loved making it purr and I think, to the horror of my cat allergic wife, that my daughter is going to be a cat person!

Anyway, also spent time with the in-laws.  They are great at making me feel welcome, and they lvoe the kids as well.  The kids played hide and seek, my mother-in-law hid too well and ended up having to make it very easy for them to find her by sitting on a chair.  Only even then they could not find her!

At school today, my son, who I am trying to teach non-violence to was attacked by a girl who was hitting his head against concrete.  Something that she had been doing to other kids.  Apparently.  That will be sorted out tomorow I think.  My daughter had a teachers evening were us parents got to find out what the basic plans are for the up coming year.  For the record, she is better than the picture above when it comes to writing.

Anyway, time to go.  I hope you like the jokes below.

Liverpool signed Fabio Borini who spent 2011 at Swansea when they were in the Championship. They also signed Jonjo Shelvey from Charlton, who are now in the Championship.
They're just getting a team together ready for next season. 

So John Terry has retired from international football..
The only internationals he'll now be appearing in are his Chelsea team mates wives.

Lukas Podolski "I'm thinking of getting an Arsenal tattoo"...
That'll be a bit awkward when he goes to Man City next year.

The new iPhone 5 is great news for Liverpool supporters.
They can see where they're on the table without scrolling down.

John Terry retires from international football to spend time with other players families

So are Man City planning on paying for Theo Walcott with their Arsenal club card points?

Well, time for a quick post about football. I missed watching the demolition of Southampton last week, just as I had to miss the European cup victory over Montpellier in the week. With the Southampton game, I was at work and had forgotten to tape Match of the Day. I did watch the highlights on Yahoo! With the game against Montpellier again I was at work so only watched the highlights on ITV. The Saint's had played well against ManUre as well as Man5hitty and some would argue that they were unfortunate not to get a draw against both teams. It could have been a hard game, but we were fortunate. An own goal helped us before we went onto score two more and another own goal really killed off the game. Gervinho opened his account for the season and Podolski scored again. The main shame was letting in a goal.

We may not have played in such an emphatic manner against Montpellier but a win is a win. And then of course, the game against Man5hitty, a team I once had a soft spot for. Before they started stealing our best players. The highlights on Yahoo! do not really do the first half justice. It was mainly Arsenal who were playing well, 5hitty not having as many chances as I would expect. Mind you, I was expecting a thumping and to watch the team play so well reminded my of the way we played the last time we won the league. It is too early to say that we will win the league, but watching that game and they way we played against the League champions coming back from that goal down, it gave credence to the way that Arséne Wenger had talked about us having a chance of winning the title this season. A lot though depends on Cazorla staying fit and playing well until Jack Wilshere is back. Our midfield looks a threat and in a strange way, not having RVP in the squad means that the team is looking at everyone to score goals. Anyway, time to go, while looking forwards to our next match.

I just been on the BBC Sport website, they really need to sort these glitches out, not only has it showed Aston Villa have won a game but it also shows they scored two goals

Afternoon all. It has been a football based few days. The kids were taken to football training on Friday. My daughter did really well scoring two goals and was given a Magic Messi sticker. She has yet to know who he is though. My son did try, but was annoyed when he did not get a sticker. My wife managed to blag one, but he knew that it was not one that he had won. But he did try, and the trick with him is to encourage him to keep trying. Both now want football tops, and rather than waiting Arsenal tops, they want them from the local team, Colchester United, which I think is great. We have shown them the tops on the internet as well as the England ones so that they can think about them before they chose which ones they would like.  Unfortunately, I did not get to watch the football last night, and now am waiting to Match of the Day 2 as I forgot to tape it last night, and worse, had forgotten that I had not taped it, so I did not watch it in the morning. Which means that I have yet to watch our victory. I am annoyed that we let in a goal, but considering the way people have been talking about our defence, they were jinxing it! Anyway, today we had a kick around in the garden. The kids did get quite tired quite quickly, but it was fun for all of us. I hope you like the song, it might get to number one...

I spy, with my little i, a lawsuit from Apple

Morning all. I have been a member of Facebook now for about a month. This weekend, we went ot Mersea and my daughter had some prawns at the West Mersea Oyster Bar. She loved it, and sucking the juices out of the prawns heads grossed me out. She loved both the taste of the juices, and the effect it had on me. I took a photo and a video and have posted it on my profile, and got loads of comments which I have shown to her, which she loves. My son is doing well at school, and yesterday was star of the day. The day before he had told my wife that is what he was going to be. She tried to let him down gently. He proved her wrong. What she will be proved right about is that he will not be star of the day today. I hope! My daughter got a book from her teacher from last year, The Twits, which is my favourite Roald Dahl book of all time. She got it yesterday and this morning, she came into our room stating that she had finished it!

Anyway, am now resting from my morning bike ride. A few years ago, I bought a bike. My wife insisted that I took someone with me who knew about bikes. I wanted to buy one for £80. I ended up with one which cost a lot more. I have not ridden on it that much since, mainly because my wife is convinced that I am going to kill myself on it. Also, I am waiting for, as you may guess, is the new iPhone. My contact expires next week, which means that I will be able to get the new one! Though the last time I got one, I got the version which you can not make calls with! The song is for my brother, who may be starting to like Guns and Roses thanks to playing Grand Theft Auto. Me, I am still addicted to Oolite, but that is another story.

A former Navy Seal has a book out that claims Osama Bin Laden was unarmed when he was shot. The book is called 'Who Cares, He's Dead.

Eleven years ago, I remember coming home from work before going of for some training for lunch.  I switched on the television to hear that a plane had flown into one of the World Trade Centre towers.  At the time, it was thought to be a terrible accident.  And then I saw the second plane fly into the second tower.  And then everyone knew that this was no accident.

I went to the training, and I remember telling people that two planes had been flown into the World Trade Centre towers. I did not think that people really took that much notice of what I said at the time. I suspect they, like the rest of the world, realised that this was an important event that night. I remember the bravery of those who ran into the towers to save others, and instead died when the towers collapsed or lived and still suffer the ill effects of the collapse. I remember seeing those above the burning floors on both buildings, those on the second tower knowing that after the first tower collapsed, that they were about to die. I knew things had changed, but like so many people, I had no idea just how much things would still change. 

So tonight, my prayers go out to those who died in the twin towers, those rescuers who died or are ill now, and of course, those who died fighting for freedom and democracy, and the many civilians who have died when caught in the resulting crossfire.

West Mersea Oyster Bar review

What a great day and great food.  Worked last night, coming back home late.  In the morning, my wife kindly let me stay in bed and took the kids to do the weekly shop.  When she came back, the kids and done the best to drive her mad.  After a bit of time to calm down and some food we decided to go out, and went to Mersea Island.  It was great there.  We have been there several times before and the kids love it.  After a very relaxing morning, we went to the West Mersea Oyster Bar.  It is somewhere that we have been on many an occasion for many years.  Being a sunny day, needless to say it was a tad busy.  Might be something to do with the weather, might be something to do with the great food, or even the mention in the Telegraph today or of course, the face that today was a brilliant sunny day.  Anyway the kids loved the food, as did my wife and I.  Which is no surprise as the only thing wrong with the place is sometimes the food portions are too large! 

I think Labour are being a bit unfair to David Cameron over his minimal reshuffle. The PM did try to move Eric Pickles, but even with the whole cabinet pushing it was hopeless

Politicians of all parties claim that the BBC is biased. Those on the left complain that most of the media is biased but me, I think that they have missed an important political point this week. Prime Ministers Questions this week, I feel, was a resounding victory for Ed Miliband who asked question after question which the Prime Minister did not answer. But, this was not really reported. My wife stated that this was due to the voice of the younger Miliband. Me, I do not think that our politicians should run for the X-factor. Fine, Miliband is not the most charismatic of politicans, but he has done a lot for the Labour party. To be fair, the government has made things easy for him with a lack of recovery and flip-flop after flip-flop. The shame is that even the left wing media have not really reported on this, the media instead commenting on the way Flashman responded. Anyway, the picture is about easyJet and seats, a change that means that I am more likely to fly with them in the future.