A failure to flatten the curve

When my brother came to see us last year, we discussed what was to happen with both Christmas our mothers birthday. After all, she was to turn 80. We discussed the different options and he agreed to book somewhere. At the time, I said that I was not sure that the birthday and/or Christmas would take place as I stated that the NHS was under pressure and I imagined that Christmas would be cancelled. Of course, it turned out that my mother did not join us for her birthday, but she did see us over Christmas.

Imagine my surprise when it was not and the queues to be seen in A&E had increased so much. In addition to this, the antibiotic shortage with Strep A may have not been as much of a problem if social distancing was put back into place. 

We went into lockdown on the previous two Christmas periods to avoid this. Yes, things would have been worse in the last two years if we had not done this, but the use of a mask alone would have reduced the horrific scenes in our hospitals up and down the country with COVID, and social distancing would have meant less worried parents trying to find antibiotics.

The Honeymoon

This is a truly terrible film. I am sorry that I suggested this to my wife yesterday. It will be hard to beat just how bad this film is. 

 

The best bits include the scenery, not just The Lake District at the start, but also Venice. It was good to see Maria Bakalova again after watching Borat Subsequent Moviefilm. Also the other great part is that it ended. Not just for the track played as the end credits rolled, but also for the second deleted scene. The film is watchable until the best man’s speech, one that is even worse than the speech from Four Weddings and a Funeral. Once you get to this part, read these spoilers and skip to end end, or just watch a different film.

After the speech, Bav accompanies Adam, his best friend, and his new bride, Sarah, on their honeymoon as Adam is worried that Bav will kill himself (later turns out that his comment about not being there was because he was to travel to India). Bav christens the honeymoon suite with diarrhoea as he blocks his own toilet due to food poisoning. He accompanies the couple on a boat trip with a “See You Next Tuesday” t-shirt but is left to his own devices for a day. During this time, he befriends the son of a Mafia boss (Giorgio) who has fallen for Sarah. The three are invited to a party with this very handsome Giorgio, who flirts with Sarah. Adam finds them cutting drugs when looking for the toilet, then as he tries to get them to leave, Baz destroys some priceless Venetian masks while trying to impress a lady. In order to pay for this, Adam and Bav are sent to deliver drugs to Slovenia and return with the money. They get pulled over at the border, but despite Bav leaking narcotics, they leave. Rather they flee after being allowed through, burn their car in panic and have to find a safe house to stay overnight. 

 

During this time, Sarah has been charmed by Giorgio who takes her to parts of Venice that has been closed off to her when she had toured the city with Adam. Giorgio promises to aid her career and shows how he can do so before allowing her to pick a fantastic dress from a selection and then charming her with a rooftop dinner overlooking the city. The boys meanwhile find the safe house. Adam waxes strips of himself as he takes of the numerous drug packets that are sellotaped to him while Bav soaks them off in the bath, inadvertently breaking a lot of the packages which mix with his bath water. The following day, the two fight over this when being taken to the drug drop (by an intimidating man called Ivan) and lose most the drugs they have remaining. 

The drop does not go well but they are saved and almost killed when the police, tipped off by Giorgio, raid the drop. The two escape with the money and make it back to Venice. When Bav leaves Ivan’s car without the drug money, they decide to rescue Sarah. They are caught but Sarah rescues them and they flee through Giorgio’s villa, more art being broken in the process. Bav sacrifices himself, but they try to same him. Giorgio let’s them go due to his love for Sarah and it sends with Bav meeting an Italian beauty just before end and Ivan discovering the money in the first of two end credit scenes.