Why do bankruptcy lawyers expect to be paid?

Good day to you all.  Right, I have had to post this.  It is a table that looks at how last season would have ended if teams had the correct decisions awarded in matches.  What surprises me most, is not just that we would have finished second in the league, but that Man $hitty gained the most from decisions.  As some of you may recall, where I work, the manager supports the Scum (and I predicted yesterday's score to him) and he has (with a huge grin) been pointing out the problems that Arsenal have had with our recent transfer activity, with both Fábregas and Nasri leaving.  Not to mention our loss against Liverpool and the draw against Newcastle.  Anyway, I can not gloat too much.  I am dreading the game on the weekend against ManUre, and am hoping that it will not be another 6-1 trashing.  And that is not even looking at the game in the European Cup tomorrow where we face what many consider to be a must win game with injured players meaning that our team is even weaker.  If we lose, I think that we will have a better chance of winning the Europa cup compared to the European Cup. 

But to the kids.  Today, I went home for lunch (one of the advantages of working closer to home) to find that my son has a Dalek costume.  Once he was dressed in it, he spent the rest of the time I was there chasing me to exterminate me!  My daughter loved it as well and joined him.  Why they do not try to kill their mother...



And something that might make you laugh.

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. She is not a “BABE” or a “CHICK” - She is a “TORSO ENHANCED CITIZEN.”

2. She is not “EASY” - She is “HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.”

3. She is not a “DUMB BLONDE” - She is a “LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.”

4. She has not “BEEN AROUND” - She is a “PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION.”

5. She does not “NAG” you - She becomes “VERBALLY REPETITIVE.”

6. She is not a “TWO-BIT HOOKER” - She is a “LOW COST PROVIDER.”

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a “BEER GUT” - He has developed a “LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.”

2. He is not a “BAD DANCER” - He is “OVERLY CAUCASIAN.”

3. He does not “GET LOST ALL THE TIME” - He “INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.”

4. He is not “BALDING” - He is in “FOLLICLE REGRESSION.”

5. He does not act like a “TOTAL ARSE” - He develops a case of “RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.”