What do Arsenal and a werewolf have in common? Both are allergic to silver.

Apart from the football result, it was a good weekend. I worked as usual on Saturday, and on Sunday I took the kids down to London and we had lunch with my Mum and two brothers. The kids loved it as they lap up the attention and also met Dougal, the dog. And afterwards my Mum came up to baby sit while my wife and I got a chance to go out. We stayed out late and I may have drunk a bit too much!

But the kids loved having my Mum up. They know that Gran is there to charm, to love and to love them. We are lucky in that the kids have two great Grandmothers. My Father-in-law is great with them as well. A shame I guess about my own Dad, but three out of four ain't bad!

First France lose to England in the rugby, then they lose to Birmingham in the final! Granddad will be happy!

Right, first of all, well done Birmingham City. They deserved to have scored more that one goal by half time, Arsenal getting lucky with an offside/penalty decision.

We did not miss Fabregas, we missed Theo. And hopefully he will be back in time for the match against Barcelona. Before the match I was not too optimistic knowing that we have a poor record in the League Cup especially against 'weaker' teams winning it only twice (against Liverpool & Sheffield Wednesday) while getting beaten in the final against teams like Swindon Town and Luton. Of course Chelski beat us as well a few years ago, but that was against what was effectively a youth team.

Anyway, time to go and I will post about the kids later. (Sob.)

Pre-Season: The time of year when Arsenal win a trophy

As an Arsenal fan I was asked what my ideal outcome would be in a Manure-Chelski game. Apparently a terrorist attack is not a valid response...

British ex pats - Avoid paying tax on your UK income by working in a politically unstable and potentially dangerous country and then complain when the bombs start going off and the British Government don't lay on enough planes to get you home.

How can I not post about the changes that have been happening recently.  

God willing, democracy will come to the Middle East, and not through liberation with bombs, but due to the people of the Middle East rising up against the tyrants who oppress them.  And hopefully, not too many will die.  As I noted earlier, such a change will be interesting for Israel, but then, I want a fair and just peace for all in the Middle East.  Many people think that it is just about Jews and Muslims, but they forget the huge number of Christians who live there as well as those who follow what is considered to be the worlds oldest religion, Zoroastrianism.  Hopefully, any democracy that exists will flourish on respecting all, rather than the majority oppressing those considered to be the minority.  I understand why many in the Middle East doubt the commitment of the west to democracy, not just because of the way democracy in Iran was toppled in favour of a dictator because of oil, but the way the west worked to bring about democracy to Palestine, and then worked to overthrow it when a government that the US did not like was elected.

Henleys Estate Agent

Evening all.  

I was listening to the radio today and heard a comedy about estate agents.  Well, lets face it, they get a bad rap.  But I have to say, when we moved houses, we sold our house with a great estate agent.  I doubt many people will get the time to read this, or even care about a great estate agent, but if you are interested in one, Henleys in Colchester are brilliant.  They do not just serve Colchester, but the area in between Colchester and Ipswich as well.  When I look back at the time we spent trying to sell our house, part of me wishes that we had used them first of all as we used two other agents beforehand, neither of whom I would recommend.  Whereas Henleys were great, honest and they addressed people as individuals, not just treating them as a commission.

Anyway, if you are interested in some jokes about the crap estate agents...

What's the difference between Sperm and an Estate Agent ?

At least a sperm has a one in a million chance of becoming a Human Being. 

Two Estate Agents were on holiday in Africa, they were enjoying themselves and decided to take a closer look at the wildlife and maybe take some pictures.

All of a sudden a lion starts running towards them, the older EA starts running for his life but looks over his shoulder and amazingly the other younger EA is opening his bag and putting on a pair of Reboks.

He say's "What are you doing, you can't out-run a lion"

The other EA say's "Sod out-running the Lion, just as long as I out run you!!

Was I right, or was I right?

What did I say?  What did I say?  I have to admit, I lost hope, but I got back in time to watch the last two goals of the game!  My wife was watching MasterChef (which I hate) and kindly let me watch the game.  And thank god she did!

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

Hope all who read this are well.  Anyway, time to post on the up coming match.  Arsenal vs Barcelona. 

I am going to be at a meeting during the match, a fixture clash organised by my Spurs supporting manager.  He knows I call them (i.e. his team) the scum, though they did well last night.  Not many expected them to do so (even though English teams seem to do well against the Italian sides).  And in a way, not many are expecting Arsenal to do well tonight.  But Barcelona seem to have been unaware of one player.  Wilshere.  He is brilliant and I think that he will be the key to the game.  Last season, I knew that it was Theo who could swing it for us, and it was thanks to him that we got our three goals.  Do not get me wrong, I think that he is vital to us having any chance tonight, but I think that our midfield has to be run by Wilshere.  And if it is, well, then I think that we can win, both at the Grove, and at the Nou Camp. 




And this might make you laugh.


How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

Why is it that people say they “slept like a baby” when babies wake up like every two hours?

Why are you IN a movie, but you’re ON TV?

Why is “bra” singular and “knickers” plural?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

If sunflower oil is made from sunflowers, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

The police have foiled my used tampon business empire... They caught me red handed

A football post.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2011/feb/12/barcelona-arsenal-champions-league

Yet another victory.  Hopefully to be repeated against Barcelona on Wednesday.  Last year I felt Theo was the key to winning.  This season it is Wilshere.  Let's hope I am right...

Going to the opticians is an eye opening experience

Something I really should have posted as the title for the post on Monday considering my rant about referees!

My son went to Jo Jingles today.  It was one of the kids birthday's there.  He refused to sing Happy Birthday.  For ages, he has wanted a birthday of his own.  Coming up to my birthday, he wanted his own birthday.  He was told his was after mine.  Well, I have had mine, and he wants his.  So when another child had his birthday, he felt that his own birthday had been stolen.  Which is sad, though it does make me laugh.  Anyway, I am to look forwards to the game on Saturday. I might get a chance to listen to bits as I drive home from work.  And then, on the day afterwards, I get to spend precious time with my family.

And for those wondering about the picture, it is about the flip flop of our Prime Minister over the proposed sell off of our nations forests.  But that is not the most important story in the news right now.  It is the liberation of Egypt.  It will be interesting to see if democracy does happen, but there and in Tunisia.  And more interesting will be the chance for democracy to spread throughout the Middle East.  That could be a double edged sword, if nothing else for Israel, but if true democracy is allowed to flourish, and is not stamped on by the west, or the dictators of the Middle East, well then the world will become a better place, and the fight against terrorism will be that much stronger. 

 

I had a terrible nightmare last week where I was diagnosed with a horrific condition called Insomnia. I haven't slept since...

Evening all.  I am sitting in front of the kids while they watch Cbeebies.  Got to spend time with them.  For the moment, I get to spend Wednesdays taking them to school.  Normally, that mean that I go to work, come back, walk them to school, leave my daughter there.  Then I walk with my son to his pre-school.  Then get back, go to work, do some more paperwork, then pick up my son, go home, have lunch, go back to work, and return to collect my daughter.

I love it, and I look forwards to Wednesdays loads, it being one of my favourite days.

Today was different.  My wife is not very well and so I stayed at home and got them ready.  My daughter and I had issues about the speed of getting ready.  I wanted her to get ready faster, she wanted to take a more relaxed approach to doing so.  I managed to convince her to do things quicker with a promise to take her to school in the double pushchair so that all her friends would get to see her in it.  Peer pressure does have its advantages.  Though we still were pushing it, and my poor son had to practically run the way there, his short legs not being able to go as fast as his big sisters.


Afterwards, my wife told me that my daughter had begged her not to go to work as "Daddy can not get me ready" and that while she has to shout at times, the level of screaming from my daughter was more than normally happens.  I am amazed at the patience of my parents at times, and having kids does make me feel sorry for them, for there are many times I feel sorry for myself, let alone my wife, after all, I get a rest by going to work!


The trip back from preschool and school was a lot better.  My son got to ride his tricycle on the way back, which was great as it tired him out and allowed him to have a nap with my wife, something that both needed.  My daughter loved being able to use her scooter to get back from school, though she was a bit tired by the time she arrived at home!

And of course there has to be time to talk about politics.  Our Prime Minister says that we are all in it together.  Which is nice, considering that his party are getting so much money from those in the city.  Mind you, it is not a surprise.  I guess those cuts will affect them then?  Oh, they will not really, well, not compared to how they could be.  Anyway, take care.

There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count and those who can't.

First of all, let me rant about the football.  Now, I know that my rant is not going to be as well formed as other people when they make posts about football.  But I am going to have to moan about a game where we played with ten men against twelve.  I know that referees have a hard time, and that mistakes are going to be made, but it was wrong that Nolan was not sent off for holding our goalie in a headlock.  Diaby did deserve to be sent off for his attack on Barton as referees should take a hard line on violent conduct.  But when Nolan was left on the pitch...
Saying that, we should have held onto a four goal lead.  That we could not, despite being two men down on Newcastle was a reflection on how well Newcastle played, how bad we played, and how crap the decisions the ref made.  And to think, Fabregas has been getting stick for allegedly making comments about referees taking bribes in the game against Everton and then this happens!  I know that Newcastle had one goal disallowed, but then so did we, and the second penalty was not one. 
But as noted, credit where credit is due.  We folded, but Newcastle played brilliantly (with the help of the ref) and the last goal was amazing.

Anyway, back to the kids.  Yesterday, took them to the shops, my son on a tricycle, my daughter on her scooter.  They both loved it.  They had stopped me watching football, my son deciding that he wanted to play it in the garden after watching me watch the first four Arsenal goals and my daughter decided to do the same.  But after they got bored in the garden, I took them to the shops.  Well, they loved the change in the routine.  Both spending time in the garden and also the new and different way of going to the shops.  My daughter did have a tendency to fall over on the scooter which is a two wheeled one, and not the fashionable ones that everyone else has.  But she loves it.  The time spent with them is precious, and is something I have to treasure as they are not going to want to spend time with me in a few years! 

Also, we went out for a rare treat.  We went to The Sun in Dedham.  My wife loved it.  She is a great cook, and I am lucky enough to have food of that standard most days.  But she does not get to enjoy such food.  She did take me out for my birthday last month, but ended up with food poisoning due to the Scallops that she ate at the Fountain House and did not like the food at The Anchor in Nayland.  The kids liked being taken out for the day and the Sun Inn is dog friendly so they got to see quite a few dogs, which where not as boisterous as Dougal, my brothers dog is, when they get to see him.  Anyway, time to go.  Until my next quick instalment.        



Q: What do you do when a blond throws a pin at you?

A: Run like hell because she has a hand grenade in her mouth.

How do you drown a blonde?

Stick a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a swimming pool

Q. Hear about the blonde that bought an AM radio?

A. It took her a month to figure out she could play it at night too.

Q. How can you tell a blonde has used your computer?

A. There is tippex on the screen.

Q. What do smart blondes and UFO's have in common?

A. You always hear about them but never see them.


Q. What do you call it when a blonde dies her hair brunette?

A. Artificial intelligence.

Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall, so the referee booked him

TRANSFER MARKET UPDATE: Sir Alex Ferguson has offered Webb a new contract because he is convinced that Howard Webb will be a perfect replacement for van der Sar. He has always come up with tremendous saves for United with impeccable consistency.