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Friday 22 July 2011

There are two types of people on this planet. Those who finish what they start and

Morning all.  It is the last day at school for my daughter today.  Not that I will get to see her that much.  It has been an amazing year with her development.  She has learned so much.  Do not get me wrong, my son has as well, but I guess I can remember more of what she did not know before she went to school.  I am proud of them both, but on days like this, when I it is brought back to me, just how much she has learned, I am even prouder.

My son yesterday decided to dice with death.  He was taken on a trip to Walton and when there, decided to try and drown himself.  Not content with going into the water, he then decided to fall down.  Fortunately my wife was at hand to look after him.  The problem for her was that she, due to the cold, was not wearing gear to be in the water.  Not only did that happen, but yesterday he called her a pillock and told her to shut up!  When I got back and heard about the pillock comment, I did laugh, but I managed to hide it from him.  He still got in trouble.

Anyway, time to go.  To think, this time last year, I was working in a place that was bad for me, and now, I am so much better! 


*TRADITIONAL ECONOMICS*
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies and the economy grows.
You retire on the income.


*INDIAN ECONOMICS *
You have two cows.
You worship them.


* PAKISTAN ECONOMICS*
You don't have any cows.
You claim that the Indian cows belong to you.
You ask the US for financial aid,
China for military aid,
Britain for warplanes,
Italy for machines,
Germany for technology,
France for submarines,
Switzerland for loans,
Russia for drugs and
Japan for equipment.
You buy the cows with all this and claim of exploitation by the world


*AMERICAN ECONOMICS*
You have two cows.
You sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
You profess surprise when the cow drops dead.
You put the blame on some nation with cows & naturally that nation will be a danger to mankind.
You wage a war to save the world and grab the cows.


*JAPANESE ECONOMICS*
You have two cows.
You re-design them so that they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
You then create cute cartoon cow images called Cowkimon and market them worldwide.

*CHINESE ECONOMICS *
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim full employment, high bovine productivity and arrest anyone reporting the actual numbers.


*RUSSIAN ECONOMICS*
You have two cows.
You count them and learn you have five cows.
You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
You count them again and learn you have 17 cows.
You give up counting and open another bottle of Vodka


* FRENCH ECONOMICS *
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.


*GERMAN ECONOMICS *
You have two cows.
You re-engineer them so that they live for 100 years, eat once a month and milk themselves.

You invade Poland for land to store the cows.

*BRITISH ECONOMICS *
You have two cows.
They are both mad.


*ITALIAN ECONOMICS*
You have two cows.
You don't know where they are.
You break for lunch.


*SWISS ECONOMICS *
You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you.
You charge others for storing them.
*WELSH ECONOMICS*
You have a cow.
You sell it for a sheep.