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Friday 4 December 2009

What does Tiger have in common with a baby seal? They’ve both been clubbed by a Norwegian.


Well, it is almost the weekend, and I am at home with my wife watching Spooks.  So far, she has not taken a golf club to me.  Have been back at work, and yes, I do like it.  I did manage to spend Wednesday with the kids.  And my wife.  (She is enjoying a banker being tortured right now by Ros who has lost the plot a bit.)

Anyway, an update on the kids.  My daughter has been to a birthday party where she sang.  My son has been to a baby gym (well, he is a toddler) and loved it.  Both happened yesterday.  Now, to bed.  Well, after Spooks... 


Apparently, the police asked Tiger’s wife how many times she hit him. She said, “I don’t know exactly, but put me down for a 5.”

What’s the difference between a car and a golf ball? Tiger can drive a ball 400 yards.

What was Elin doing out at 2.30 in the morning? Clubbing

What is the penalty for getting it in the wrong hole? Ask Tiger, he knows.

Nike wants to drop their endorsement due to accuracy problems. Apparently, Tiger’s spraying his balls everywhere.

It turns out that fixing Tiger’s game and fixing his marriage both require the same thing: better control over his putz.

Tiger just changed his nickname but still kept it in the cat family. Cheetah.

Elin Woods has a twin sister named Josephine. Know how to tell them apart? Elin is the one holding the bent 5 iron.

What do Tiger and the Beatles have in common? They both experienced a hit with Norwegian Wood.

First words spoken to the paramedics by Tiger: Who are you? And what are all these trees doing in my living room?